1. For no apparent reason, your car would crash... twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the highway for some reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning.
7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no apparent reason, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced, buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as with the old car.
10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
AND... If all else failed, you could call Customer Service in some foreign country and be instructed in a foreign language how to fix your car yourself.
Cat's Corner | December 9, 2009
8 years ago